Oh my fucking god, day 0 was absolutely awful but also so much fun so it’s okay. Driving up to Pemberton we were stuck in traffic for two hours. It wasn’t so bad though because everyone was blasting music, sitting on top of their cars, and passing beers around. Within seconds of pulling into the parking lot and getting out of the car, we were attacked by 1,000 mosquitos. Side note: there are no mosquitos in Reno so fuck you Canada. (jk jk still love you)
After waiting in a massive line for two hours, we got on our school bus full of miscellaneous camping gear and other attendees to get to the actual campsite. Our bus driver had a pretty dope mustache so everything was well in the world for those five minutes until we had to wait in more lines. We eventually got past security and arrived at our 10′ x 12′ campsite after 5 and a half hours of consistent waiting! God bless.
PRO TIP: Bring a wagon, bring a wagon, BRING A WAGON. Without it we may have actually dropped dead. Best purchase, you won’t regret it.
PRO TIP #2: Invest in an EZ up especially when it rains
After getting settled in, we popped open the Bacardi and explored the campgrounds. We found out about a Pemby tradition… CHICKEN FIGHTS! Chicken fights? No pool was involved. Medical staff was sometimes involved. Guys went up against guys. Girls went up against girls. Girls went up against guys that were twice the size of them. Honestly, it should be broadcasted on TV over the UFC, WWE, and whatever other ones they have.
So far I have learned that Canadians are fucking insane but the good kind of insane. The kind I want to be friends with.
We fell asleep to the sound of rowdy chicken fight fans and drunken conversations taking place in the tents around us. We woke up bright and early while others never went to sleep in the first place. The anticipation of the festival opening led to what seemed like the longest morning of my life.
On the first day of music, I saw Pell, The Zolas, Keys N Krates, Snoop Dogg, Bassnectar, Rae Sremmurd, and a little bit of Purity Ring.
Keys N Krates and Bassnectar were my favorites of the day. Spread my ashes at Bass Camp, please and thank you. Purity Ring sounded great, and Pell was surprisingly good considering I had no idea who he was. I recommend.
I hate to say this, but Snoop Dogg did not hold up to my expectations. Never have I been so legitimately bored at a concert until that moment. (Sorry Snoop, still love you) Our whole group was divided with no way of contacting each other, yet every single one of us ended up back at camp before Snoop Dogg was over. If that doesn’t say something, I don’t know what else would. Ugh, sorry. Dope graphics though.
Another thing I learned this day was that they grow them tall in Canada. I swear every guy in front of me was at least 6 feet tall.
Miami Horror had a pop-up concert right next to our tent at 11 in the morning which was a wonderful thing to wake up to. It’s really nice listening to some live music while waiting in the long ass lines for the port-a-potties or the general store. Great start to day 2, and it made the morning seem way shorter than Thursday.
We saw Hippie Sabotage, Hudson Mohawke, Cold War Kids, Steve Angello, J. Cole, Kaskade, and Big Gigantic.
Everybody was SO FANTASTIC. I had some life realizations that included J. Cole and I getting married, Steve Angello and Kaskade playing at my wedding, and Big Gigantic following me around everywhere playing music for the rest of my life.
The consistent rain led to a double rainbow appearing during Steve Angello. Does that not scream magical? Also, I got stepped on at Cold War Kids because I hardly wore shoes the whole weekend… worth it.
Best day ever. We saw BØRNS, Quaker City Night Hawks, Tory Lanez, Billy Idol, The Chainsmokers, The Killers, Wiz Khalifa, Die Antwoord, and YG.
BØRNS was #1 of the whole weekend. The sun was shining, the whole group was together for once, the music was beautiful, and the mountain was magnetizing. We were dancing and jumping and smiling from ear to ear. Also, I want to puke because Quaker City Night Hawks was so much fucking fun.
However Tory Lanez was absolutely awful. I really don’t know how we ended up there in the first place. Granted, Tory Lanez music is not my scene at all. Real question though, why do rappers always feel the need to hype themselves up so much before every song? STOP STOPPING THE FUCKING BEAT. *rolls eyes*
On the topic of YG, I love your music but hate your performance. Once again, stop stopping the beat and please PLEASE can you play one song all the way through?
Billy Idol reminded me of an incredibly aged David Bowie (RIP), and I am so glad I saw him because look at this:
The Chainsmokers were thoroughly disappointing because they should have been scheduled at night! You just can’t get as grimy during the day. Am I right, amirite??? Don’t get me wrong, I still got down but it just wasn’t the same. I don’t want to look at you while you’re getting it and I definitely don’t want you looking at me. Should have gone to Ice Cube, dammit.
On a better note, they aren’t named “The Killers” for nothing. Brandon Flowers and the rest of the band absolutely killed it. Made my top three of the whole weekend.
Wiz and Die Antwoord were scheduled at the same time, so we started at Wiz but left to get grimy for a quick sec because we didn’t really at Chainsmokers. Honestly, what the fuck is Die Antwoord and what the fuck is their crowd. People had crucifixes drawn on their face and crazed expressions. Eh, I’m with it though. Also, mad respect for Wiz for being the only rapper (besides J.Cole) to not stop the beat and actually rap all the lyrics. Ily.
I blinked and it was already day 4? WTF. I never wanted to leave. For our final day, we watched The Funk Hunters, Coleman Hell, Anderson Paak, SZA, Jesse Roper, Tyler the Creator, and DJ Snake.
The Funk Hunters were just as fabulous as Big Gigantic. Play that funky music white boy! Coleman Hell landed #2 for best performance of the whole weekend. The sun was shining once again, and we were dancing like no one was watching.
Anderson Paak and SZA were the only two acts playing at 4:15pm, and we really didn’t like either. Eep, sorry. However, not liking these acts led us to the tiny Whistler stage where I found my new love, Jesse Roper. Jesse Roper had better hair than me and played the guitar like no other. It was incredible, and he isn’t very known so the crowd was small but powerful. The rain poured in as we were dancing under the tent, and by the time the set was over, the rain had cleared and it all just worked out perfectly. Jesse Roper, ily.
I love love love Tyler the Creator and DJ Snake was a fun closing act. We skipped out on Pearl Jam (yeah, we suck for that one) to avoid all the traffic, packed up our tent, and drove back to Seattle.
Best weekend of my life!!!